Book: 20190608 to 20190701，"The subtle art of not giving a f*ck" by Mark Manson

20190608， chapter 1. "Don't Try"

This book is interesting.

I know that time management is all about priority. This book will tell me about how to know the priority of all kinds of things we have everyday. How to spend the time and so not going to regret when we retire.

The one who is easy to get sad, angry or nervous, normally is because he/she doesn't know what to do. They don't know what is important. That's why they start to focus on tiny issues.

20190610， chapter 2. "Happiness Is a Problem"

Money doesn't bring happiness to us, but making money does.

So, it's not about what you own, it's about what you do.

Same as "4-hour chef" says, "It's not about your position, it's about what you do next."

This is the source of happiness.

20190611， chapter 3. "You are not special"

Most of people have average IQ and talent. Most of them suppose to get average life.

There is nothing wrong about it. But, most of people are not happy about that, they want to be special.

I think terrorism and religion are based on this kind of thoughts. There are only 0.0001% of people are terrorists, so, if you join them, then you are special, and deserve something special.

I would say, this speculation is quite stupid.

We need to admit that we are normal people, but still can fullfill our life.

20190615， chapter 4. "The value of suffering"

This chapter reminds me of the post How to Pick a Career (That Actually Fits You)

What is the value of our life? Is it really money or reputation?

Just like what "Thinking, fast and slow" says, if you can own something without paying attention, then it will not bring happiness to you. That's why astounding view will not make you happy, but having discussion/sex/party may do it.

"Healthy values are achieved internally."
"Bad values are generally reliant on external events."

In other words, healthy values affect external environment, but bad values are affected by external environment.

20190621， chapter 5. "You are always choosing"

"When we feel that we're choosing our problems, we feel empowered. When we feel that our problems are being forced upon us against our will, we feel victimized and miserable."

This is exactly what "4-hour chef" said: Position is not important. It's all about "Action".

The interesting part is about the current mainstream media, and AI. AI only shows us the Advertisements, news and facts that may attract us. This is terrible, and more like brainwash. We will not be able of judging and weighing properly based on such filtered information.

20190623， chapter 6. "You're wrong about everything (but so am I)"

Absolute truth doesn't exist. We can never reach it.

But we can get closer and closer to it.

Just keep in mind, no matter how close we are, we are not there, which means, we are still wrong.

"Certainty is the enemy of growth." "That's why accepting the inevitable imperfections of our values is necessary for any growth to take place."

"The problem here is that not only is certainty unattainable, but the pursuit of certainty often breeds more (and worse) unsecurity."

"In this way, 'knowing yourself' or 'finding yourself' can be dangerous. It can cement you into a strict role and saddle you with unnecessary expectations."

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without acccepting it."

君子和而不同.

"If it's down to me being screwed up, or everybody else being screwed up, it is far, far, far more likely that I'm the one who's screwed up."

20190627， chapter 7. "Failure Is the Way Forward"

>>"Don’t just sit there. Do something. The answers will follow."
>>"Action isn’t just the effect of motivation; it’s also the cause of it."


Starting from age 43, I realized that, if I don't know what to do, or what is my target, I should read class A non-fiction books. So far, it works pretty good.

Of course, "physical exercise" is another good action.

Not just "do something", it's "do something meaningful", do something for the target, anything.

When the snowball is rolling, it will get bigger and bigger.

PS: why Elon Musk is so successful? He knows what the shortcut is. He not just do something, normally he can do the correct thing directly, which saved a lot of time. And, he works very long time.

20190629， chapter 8. "The Importance of Saying No"

This chapter discussed two topics: boundaries and options.

Boundary is about "relationship". For two persons to get along with each other, they need to know the boundary between them. They need to understand what is his/her responsibility, what belongs to the other side.

Without it, we may blame the other side for any problem and cannot really help to resolve the problem.

Boundary is not just among people, it's also among different organizations and departments.

Option is about "distraction". The more option, the more distraction. As any stage of our life, we are facing infinite choices, and have no idea which one is best for us, for long term. This one is a good example: How to Pick a Career (That Actually Fits You)

So, what should we do? "Thinking, fast and slow" tells me to see through the illusion, but that will never guarantee to see the truth. Actually, no one can see the truth, but only getting closer to it.

We don't need to choose the correct one, even if it exist. What we need to do is "grow". If we keep learning and practising, then we are on the right way.

Distance =  Speed * Time

If we are moving forward for long time, we will achive great reward.

20190701， chapter 9. "......And then we die"

We want to move forward and achive something, but why?

This chapter discussed the final question: what is the root power which push us forward?

The whole history of human being is all about "accumulation". Our IQ is not so different from other animals. It's knowledge accumulation make us standing out.

Our gene make us want to do something in this accumulation procedure. They make us want to leave our name there. Maybe that's also the reason that I want to write blog posts, although not likely many people will read them.

Another action is setting up family and raising children. That's how we can contribute to human society. We want our children to achive great work, so more people will remember their parents. :-)

PS 1: What make an individual different from others? Same: "accumulation". What we do everyday, eventually make us different from others in the future. Homeless people and Bill Gates, all same.

PS 2: I believe this is related to our gene. Maybe I should read "Selfish Gene" for further understanding.